An adrenalin rush!

At 4:45 I was on my way out the door when the overhead speaker came to life; "Infant code 99 in ER. Infant code 99 in ER" Everything changed in that moment. The clinical nurse in me dropped my coat and I found myself running to the ER.

I had not physically participated in direct care of any patient for months and not an infant in two years. The most amazing thing for me about adrenalin and anxiety is the focus it creates for me. I see everything and even find great economy and directness in my physical activity. Who I am seeps out. I can stand and watch and help, but it is contrary to who I am. This time was no time to stand back. A life was very clearly going to end without the right things being done, and done fast. This is what I love to do and where I flourish.

No hesitation, no searching for knowledge not recently used. I stepped right back into the familiar. The flight nurse who had so accurately assessed an acute change in the babes condition obviously had skills. The rest in the room while talented and smart just so rarely see or deal with infants. The scene was taken in rapidly and an assessment made. Needs were rapidly identified and prioritized.

The IV was crap and the babe had been used as a pin cushion. Started a better line in under three minutes. Damn that felt good!!! Assessed the fluids being given and got them increased. turned back to the flight nurse still struggling with managing numbers. Reminded her to focus on the baby not it's numbers. We needed an endotracheal tube. Then I became the coach. Telling others what we needed while she got the ET in place. The mind flying and taking control.

Felt the flight nurse take my forearm and say, "Thank you! This baby needed you. And where in the heck did you learn all this and end up in the middle of nowhere?" Told her I am no longer a clinical nurse but I play one at codes.

The airway wasn't' working. Replaced it. Still not working. Told her not to pull it. Trust her skills and think about the diagnosis. We tried a neb treatment and it worked. The lungs became more compliant in an instant. I felt like I could breath again too. We all did!

Best of all the baby began in short order to move and open her eyes. It was working! The flight nurse went to confer by phone with her MD control. When I looked up all eyes were looking to me for what came next.

It was such a reaffirming thing to be able to bring my skill to bear with such success. (never a guarantee) To see those who I work with and manage, turning to me for what I can do clinically. Now they were learning, building there experience and we set about making sure the babe stayed stable.

She went over the hills and is dong fine now. Nothing is more rewarding than knowing she and her parents will have more time. They will be able to share all of what is so truly important in life. Family and friends.

For me personally however it was also about, in those minutes, building more credibility with my colleagues than I have in 4 months. No longer just one to push excellence in care giving through words, but actions as well.